If you have read articles about navy, military or navy girlfriends, you already know that certain things make relationships very strong. Maybe you met a man or woman in uniform, and you became very curious about the things that come with having a relationship with men and women in uniform.
Perhaps you are already in a relationship or dating someone in the service and want to know more before taking the next big step. Dating people with a military background is not as glamorous as what most Hollywood movies make it appear.
If you are planning to date a man or woman in uniform seriously, there are things that you need to consider. Here are some of the things you need to know about dating men in service. The list is not meant to discourage people from dating men or women in the service. It is intended to give people an idea or give people who are curious or with questions, some realistic advice into what goes around within military relationships.
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You need to be prepared to be from each other
At one point in their military career, people in uniform will live away from their friends, family or loved ones. There is a big chance that you will go to places you have never been to before. If you are dating army people, they may get moved to faraway places (called deployment), and you will be left behind.
There is little that you can do when they complain about their work. You will experience days where they love their job and days where they will say it is a big mistake to enlist in the military and they can’t wait for the day they finish their contract with the military.
When they are having a lousy day, all you can do is to listen and try to give advice, even if it is a useless one. But unless you also served in the military, there is nothing you can do when these days come. When you are a civilian, it is easy to give advice like “find other work or job.” It is not the case with the military.
People working in the army can’t be on the side of their loved ones all the time. If you always need constant affection and attention, you need to know that service members may not be able to give the care and love that you needed. You cannot expect these people to be physically there all the time when it comes to their duties, and it is certainly not right to guilt-trip them about it.
Your career or education may take a back seat or needs to be changed
If your career demands that you need to be in one place for an extended period, you need to know that there is a big chance that difficult choices will be in your future if you are in a serious relationship with military personnel.
These people will break their tradition
It refers to their traditions. Military people and service members may miss anniversaries, birthdays, the birth of their children, Christmas or new year. If it is a tradition that they will dress up as Santa clause during Christmas, you need to be prepared to celebrate it without them or arrange the holiday season for another time.
Your stress and anxiety level will always be at its peak
While you do not serve in the army, navy or the military in general, you care for the people that do. You may receive emails or phone calls where you hear gunshots and bombs dropping in the background. After that, you will not hear from them for a couple of days, sometimes even weeks or months.
Not only that, you need to manage things on your side by yourself. You need to make sure that you can handle this kind of anxiety and stress. If not, you need to have a great support group to lean on when push comes to shove.
You need to make grown-up decisions all the time
When you are dating someone from the army, you may find yourself making decisions all the time. When will you move in? When will you get married? How many kids do you want? All of these decisions’ needs are grown-up decisions that you need to make sooner than later compared to your relationships with a civilian.
That is because if you are in a relationship with a military person, there are too many uncertainties, so you need to figure out and start over again. You need to have a social circle because as much as you love your friends at one duty station, it might be hard for you to look for new friends at another duty station.
Fitting in can be very difficult
When you are dating someone in the military, you may feel left out when you hang out with their military circles. Their job will be the only topic they want to talk about. The different assignments, the places they went to or talking about the officers they don’t like. Not only that, they like to throw military terms, acronyms and phrases that you don’t understand.
You also might encounter military jokes that only they will understand. There is also an ugly sector of the military life where online trolls or bullies will make fun of anyone who is in a relationship with a uniformed officer. These trolls will ridicule anything from your looks, the things you buy in your personal life. You have to stay lighthearted and do not take everything too seriously.
If you are dating people in the military, all you have to do is fall in love and forget everything. But do not forget to be prepared for the new adventures, new places and new people that you will meet. Military life will throw everything at you. You need to be stronger, more independent and braver if you want to survive.